Showing posts with label Karla Scott. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Karla Scott. Show all posts

Friday, October 22, 2010

Photo Organizing-Help, I need a system!!



Dear Abbey,

Today in Chicago, in my childhood home, I must tackle (inherited) 10+ file size boxes of family photos. Some are in albums, some in frames, and some are lose. It’s just me left in the family-(no siblings or future generations). At least ½ of the photos are of my parents over the past 20 years (or so).

Do you have any ideas on how to approach this task?
I will not scan them all nor do I want to pay $1000s to store them. I am leaving here for good (after the house is sold) and need to say all my goodbyes—even to these important family mementos.

BTW, I must have more than 20 boxes of neatly organized, scrapbooked photos of my own in Miami.

Sincerely, Overwhelmed from Miami

REPLY

Sent: Thursday, October 21, 2010 7:35 PM
To: Karla Scott
Subject: Re: Photo Organizing-I need a system

As you know Karla, I need help organizing myself but my gut feeling is that since you already have 20 boxes of neatly organized scrapbooks of your own, you might have photos of your parents and family already.
Can you just reduce those twenty boxes to maybe one scrapbook for yourself of the most important photos and get rid of the rest. After all, if you are the only one left, who is going to want to see those photos besides you?
It might feel painful at first but what choices do you have?

Hope this helps.

As ever,
Betty (Abbey)

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Advice for a caregiver from "an expert"


Here is a great letter and response from Gary Barg, of caregiver.com

A Caregiver's Friends and Family Plan

My column in last week’s newsletter about my friend who moved home to help take care of his father brought a flood of responses. In my friend’s case, his previously healthy mother died suddenly while taking care of his father (not an unusual occurrence for the primary caregiver in any family). I know how difficult it can be to take a break from the stress of caregiving, even when we know it is the best thing we possibly can do for ourselves and the loved one for whom we care. The obvious answer is getting our friends and family to help us more, but that is trickier than it seems.

Florence’s email is a case in point.

Hi Gary,

I am drowning in stress due to caring for my mother who has cancer. I am single and an only child, so I feel that I have no one to talk to about what I am going through.

I am a healthcare professional (nurse) as well, which makes it worse sometimes because I know all too well what she is doing wrong when she is noncompliant.
It seems lately that all I do is work and take care of her. I do not have anyone to go do something fun with from time to time, which makes it really hard.

I just feel trapped and alone in this situation. I love my mother very much, but I just need relief from all of this constant responsibility and care for her. She does not have the money for me to bring in a hired person, nor does she really need it as of yet. She is so finicky that no one but me can do things right for her. What I would not give for a sister at this time.

OK, I'm through venting :-). I feel better having put all this onto you (ha!). I'm actually going to sit down and watch a TV program all the way through tonight!!

Thanks for listening,
Florence

Florence,

Your mom is quite lucky to have a daughter like you. Actually, I think the first best step is reaching out and just putting your feelings on paper (or a computer screen). I don’t know where you live or if your mom has any friends or you have any other relatives who could step in and lend a hand. Many times the challenge is that people don’t know how to help until we give them specific duties. Please see link below.

The other thing I would recommend is a support group (I know what you might be thinking), but support groups become our families of choice and great friends are made from the time spent together. I think it would be a great idea to see if your mom may have any activities that she really enjoys, in which she can spend some time so you can also get some time off. As a care professional, you know that the awful truth is that if you cannot find a way to create an informal support team or make some space for you to have some relief, your mom's best support is at risk—you.

Besides, you certainly do deserve it.

http://www.caregiver.com//articles/general/reverse_gift_list.htm


How do you get your friends and family to help you?




Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Warning Signs of a Possible Need for Help


Here is a great article and list of warning signs your elder needs help. (See source below)

The real challenge facing elders and their loved ones, is the ability to differentiate normal aging, from the warning signs that something may be wrong, requiring some form of intervention. It is important to note that we all have a bad day - our hair in uncombed, we forget an appointment, or we feel depressed; however a recurrent pattern may indicate a problem.

We are providing a list of some questions that may help you evaluate if there is a potential problem, but this list is only meant to serve as a guide. If a problem is suspected, the elder needs to be seen by a professional who can conduct a complete medical evaluation and a geriatric assessment, and help determine the best way to proceed.

1. Is the person experiencing any significant vision, hearing, or memory loss?

2. Is the person experiencing any anxiety, depression, or phobias?

3. Is the person oriented to time, place, and person?

4. Is the person able to read, write, and use the telephone without difficulty?

5. Is the person able to use public transportation, or arrange to take a cab?

6. Is the person able to perform routine housekeeping tasks (e.g. laundry, cooking, cleaning)

7. Is the person able to handle maintenance needs?

8. Is the person able to prepare meals and eat regularly?

9. Is the person able to bath independently?

10. Is the person able to dress appropriately?

11. Is the person able to manage their own finances?

12. Is the person able to handle their own banking and financial needs?

13. Is the person able to write checks & balance their checkbook?

14. Is the person able to exercise good judgment, and make sound decisions?

15. Is the person able to manage their own medications?

16. Is the person able to go shopping for groceries?

17. Is the person able to maintain relationships with family and friends?

18. Is the person able to walk, climb stairs, and remain standing?

19. Is the person able to easily and safely get up and down from a chair?

20. Is the person able to fall asleep and stay asleep?

21. Is the person able to remember family names, and appointments?

22. Is the person able to safely see & operate appliances?

23. Is the person able to drive?

24. Is the person able to hear the phone ring, and understand a conversation?

25. Is the person able to participate in leisure activities?

26. Is the person expressing any issues or concerns?

27. Is the person experiencing a sudden weight loss or gain?

28. Is the person experiencing any health concerns?

29. Is the person experiencing any bruises or cuts?

30. Is there any evidence that the person is the victim of fraud or abuse?

from caregiverresourcecenter.com

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Some Of The Best Exercise I’ve Ever Had

De-cluttering my childhood home and staging it for sale has given me some of the best exercise I’ve had in a long time.

As we have emptied more than equivalent of 12 closets full of clothing, de-cluttered 12 rooms, and staged the entire house, I’ve been exercising constantly because the house is two stories and there’s also a large basement so I’ve been climbing up and down two different flights of stairs for four days – nonstop!!

Removal of Family Photos Is The Hardest


The hardest part of decluttering my childhood home in preparation for listing it for sale is the removal of all the family photos. Each time someone took down a photo I felt as though I was dying or that I was being killed.

Although the house is nice and neat and cluttered now, I feel it has no soul.

There’s no evidence that the Scott family ever existed. It’s a very dark feeling.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Using a dumpster for clearing the clutter is not always a good idea

As I evaluate it options for decluttering my childhood home, I considered renting a dumpster that would sit outside in front of the house. Many of those whom I consulted cautioned me on the downside of selecting this option now. What they explained is that typically when someone rents a dumpster, anyone who lives within an 8 mile radius we’ll add their junk to the bin. I never even considered that reality.

What we have decided to do is to temporarily convert the garage into a storage area for all the junk. Once the house is free of all that junk that is in the garage, and then I will hire a dumpster company to bring a dumpster into the alley right next to the garage.

Hiring a dumpster is very expensive; I want to make sure that I get the full use of this service.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Selling My Childhood House is Hard


I knew that selling my childhood home would be hard work but doing this from long distance is especially challenging.

I am reading books on clearing out parents’ estates, de-cluttering, and how to keep my asthma at bay while dealing with all the dust and molds, there.

I am engaging the help of:

A Chicago realtor who works in that part of town
Estate attorney there(who is slow and unresponsive)
My lawyer here
A professional organizer who is one of my childhood best friends
Someone to clean the house, especially my room that is full of allergens
A contractor/mover/handyman/strong guy
Insurance company
Friends of Mom (challenging because the few left are over 90) and charities to come take certain items

I will go to Chicago next week, for a week, with the goal of preparing the house for staging---To list it for sale!

I have been reading Boomer Burden by Julie Hall—The subtitle is Dealing With Your Parents’ Lifetime Accumulation of Stuff. I find it extremely informative, chock full of helpful tips.

I will talk more about my journey and this book in my next post.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Tips for checking on your Mom or Grandmom during your Mother’s Day Visit


Gary Barg, founder of Caregiver.com, offers great advice for your visit to Mom:

To Grandmother’s (and Mom’s) house we go this weekend all across the country to visit our dear moms and grandmas. If you are a long-distance caregiver, this trip offers an opportunity to spend time with loved ones and take stock of how well they are doing on their own.

Some of the things you may want to check on while in the house:
• Is there a good variety of food in the refrigerator?
• That are the expiration dates on the perishables?
• Are the medications being utilized and up to date?
• Is there an emergency medical kit in easy reach of the occupants?
• Are there any safety hazards in the bathroom (are rails needed, are mats slippery?)
• Are bills being paid or are they piled up unpaid in a corner?
• If they have a pet, is there plenty of fresh water and food available? (You may want to contact Meals on Wheels and inquire about the “We All Love Our Pets" program or WALOP; www.mowaa.org)

Gary Barg
Editor-in-Chief
gary@caregiver.com

Friday, April 16, 2010

Knowing the Warning Signs of a Stroke Could be the Best Prevention


We can NEVER hear this reminder too often!!

Here is an article from caregiver.org, reminding us of stroke warning signs.:

Stroke is our nations #3 killer and our best defense is to recognize the warning signs. It is possible to decrease your chances of having a stroke through education and a healthy lifestyle. Your brain needs blood, oxygen, and nutrients to function. A stroke occurs when a blood vessel that feeds the brain these vital elements becomes clogged or bursts. That part of the brain is damaged and will not work, along with the part of the body it controls. Transient ischemic attacks, or TIA’s occur before the onset of a major stroke. They are considered to be a ‘warning stroke’. TIA’s happen when a blood clot clogs an artery for a short time. The signs of a stroke and TIA are similar; the difference is TIA’s usually last only a few minutes.

What are the warning signs of stroke or TIA? You may have some or all of these symptoms:

Unable to feel one side of the face or body

Sudden weakness in an arm, hand, or leg

Confusion

Trouble speaking

Dizziness or loss of balance

Sudden onset of a terribly painful headache

Unable to see out of one eye or double vision

If we as caregivers recognize these warning signs and take action quickly, we could save the life of the person we are caring for or prevent a bad stroke.

A healthy lifestyle is important in possible stroke prevention, which means reducing the known factors. Uncontrolled high blood pressure, heart disease and smoking are major causes of stroke.

High blood pressure can be reduced by:

Loosing weight if it is necessary

Eating a healthy diet low in salt and fat

Becoming more active

Limiting alcohol intake to no more than 2 drinks per day

Taking medicine the way it is prescribed by your doctor

Heart and blood vessel problems develop when arteries that feed blood to the heart and brain slowly become clogged with a buildup of cells, fat and cholesterol. When the blood cannot get through, you could have a heart attack or stroke.

Heart disease may be prevented by:

Stopping smoking

Lowering your blood pressure

Eating a healthy diet

Being physically active

Getting regular medical checkups

Quitting smoking will dramatically reduce your risk of having a stroke. Although it is difficult, there are measures to help cope with the stress of not smoking. You can write down the reasons why you quit and look at the list often. You may also want to go places where there is no smoking allowed. For more information, contact the American Heart Association for tips on how to quit smoking.

A healthy diet and regular exercise program help reduce chances of an attack also. As caregivers, knowing the warning signs and encouraging a healthy lifestyle is the best armor in the battle to save our care recipients—and ourselves--from having a major stroke.

Friday, March 26, 2010

Can I Take Dad's Car Keys From Him? How?


A Tale of Two Cities by Gary Barg caregiver.com

Yesterday marked our fourth annual Miami Fearless Caregiver Conference (and 93rd event to date). It was a sunny, beautiful day with a packed house of family caregivers. As I told the assemblage at the beginning of the day, to celebrate, we arranged for the television show “Burn Notice” to shoot in the parking lot. (It was just a coincidence, but hey, I would have arranged such a thing if I could have.) Earlier this month, we hosted the second annual Nashville Fearless Caregiver Conference (keeping with the celebrity theme, we were honored to be joined by MS advocate, multi-platinum recording artist, and really nice guy Clay Walker). Represented on the Question and Answer panels at both events were experts including: physicians, pharmacists, Social Security, hospice and our partners at the local Alliance for Aging and Area Agency on Aging organizations.

One other coincidence during these events is that the most astonishing questions came from two young people with the same comment, “Well, I know that my parent should stop driving, but...” Their stories were equally jaw-dropping. From the young man in Nashville whose mother is living with mid-stage Alzheimer’s disease to the young lady in Miami whose dad can’t hold a jar, let alone drive, due to the effects of Parkinson’s disease, their remarks were show-stoppers at both events.

I was overwhelmed by the wide range of observations, concerns and suggestions from their fellow caregivers—from hide the keys to immediately calling the Department of Transportation. But the Legal Aid attorney who joined us in Nashville distilled the take-home lesson in only a few words when the young man asked if he or his family could be at risk if his mom hurt anyone by remaining behind the wheel. She said, “I know a dozen attorneys who would be chomping at the bit to take the case against you!” Case closed.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Today: I Will Attend My 5th Annual Fearless Caregiver Conference


Here is an excerpt from my May 24, 2007 blog post:

Fearless caregiver conferences, hosted across the country, bring together caregivers and elder care experts, to share their knowledge and experience. These conferences, generally free to the public, are offered by several dozen sponsors and exhibitors who wish to provide information on the plethora of products and services available to assist caregivers in making the best decisions in giving the best care for their aging loved ones.

The format for these helpful conferences consist of an exhibit area, where more than 35 exhibitors provide caregiver information on some of the following: long-term care insurance, Alzheimer's disease, hearing a technology, personal emergency response systems (PERS) monitoring services, assisted living facilities, nursing home facilities, home health care services, reading and vision products, breast cancer research, hygiene products, blindness prevention, hospice services, geriatric care management services, transportation, helpful literature and many more. In addition, a panel of experts delivered presentations on specific areas of long-term caregiving and they shared their wisdom in a lively question and answer session designed to solicit rich discussion helpful to all attendees. The AARP even provided comprehensive training manuals for caregivers in both English and Spanish.

Gary Barg, a noted speaker, writer and publisher on caregiving issues created the Fearless Caregiver Conferences. He is an inspiration to me providing a forum where elder care experts and experienced caregivers can share their knowledge with others. He draws upon his experience as a caregiver since 1995.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Twenty Ways To Care for Caregivers


Twenty of the best tips and ideas collected from Caregivers and care managers of the Medicare Alzheimer's Project in Broward and Dade Counties, Florida. by Gary Barg of Caregiver.com


Laugh about something everyday

Take care of yourself physically.

Eat a well-balanced diet.

Talk with someone every day.

Let family and friends help. Give them printed material on memory disorders so they can better understand your relative. Give them a chance.

Give yourself permission to have a good cry. Tears aren't a weakness, they reduce tension.

Exercise. A brisk walk counts.

Get adequate rest.

Try a bowl of Cheerios and milk before bed to promote sleep.

Avoid noisy and/or tension-filled movies at night. The late news itself can add to stress. Skip it.

Reduce daily caffeine intake.

Get professional help if you feel your support system isn't adequate or if you feel overwhelmed.

Take a break very day, even if it's only 10 minutes alone in the backyard.

Explore community resources and connect yourself with them.

Listen to music.

Learn relaxation techniques.

Regularly attend one or more support groups and education workshops.

Give yourself a treat at least once a month: an ice cream cone....a new shirt or dress....a night out with friends....a flowering plant.

Read your Caregiver's Bill of Rights (and Today's Caregiver magazine)

Know your limitations.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

2009 Taxes for Dad


It is 2009 income tax time and I just discovered I must file on Dad’s behalf and attach court certification that I am executor of his estate. Since I did them the past three years using Turbo Tax, I hope the software knows how to guide me since Dad passed last year.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Women Gain Most From Long Term Care Planning


By AARP Education & Outreach

Women are more likely than men to experience the need for long-term care. Planning early for retirement—and any long-term care you may need—is one of the smartest decisions you can make.

There's just no stopping American women, especially those who are part of that dynamic force of 60 million 45- to 64-year-olds whose influence is evident in every thread of the nation's tapestry. You're independent vocal women who expect to have it all and often find yourself challenged to do it all—at home, in the workplace, and in the community. Add to that the demands of caring for aging parents, and it's no wonder that you have little time to slow down to take care of yourself, including developing personal and financial plans for your long-term care.

What is Long-term Care?
It's a common name that many are hard-pressed to define, but think of long-term care as the support you may need down the road simply to go about daily life. This kind of care can include changes to make your home more accessible, safe, and comfortable; technology that prolongs independence; or services that offer help with meals, transportation, and personal care.

Long-term care also includes medical care such as rehabilitation services or visits from a nurse. The need for these kinds of services can last several months, years, or until the end of life. Many people receive long-term care at home or through adult-day programs and other community services. Others move into supportive housing with meals and housekeeping, assisted living for people who still have a measure of independence but need help with personal care, or a nursing home for those who can no longer care for themselves.

Why Women?
Research shows that you’re more likely to have a need for long-term care than men. Here's why some experts consider this challenge a major issue for women of the boomer generation.
• Women live longer. According to AARP's Public Policy Institute, women make up more than two-thirds of Americans age 85 or older. Those who reach 65 can expect to live an average of 20 more years, outliving men by about five years.
• Women have fewer resources. Women often have drastically lower incomes than men, especially women who have gone through divorce, widowhood, job loss, and who have served others as caregivers, reports the Women's Institute for a Secure Retirement. Almost half of women 75 or older live alone. On average, says AARP, their income is only three-quarters of what older men make—and less than half of what older couples bring in.
• Women are more likely to need long-term care. About 79 percent of 65-year-old women will need some long-term care during their lifetime, finds Georgetown University's Health Policy Institute. On average, these women will end up needing 3.7 years of care. Men age 65 are likely to need about 2.2 years of care over the rest of their lives.
• Many women aren't planning for the future. An AARP report on whether middle-age women are ready for retirement warns that many of this generation—even those on the verge of retiring—don't know how much income they'll need and what costs they'll need to cover.
• Long-term care is expensive. In 2009, the average national cost for assisted living was more than $34,000 a year, according to the annual Genworth Cost of Care Survey. The yearly cost of a private room in a nursing home was nearly $75,000, and costs for home-health aides averaged almost $19 an hour. AARP's Long-Term Care Cost Calculator can help you figure out the cost of care by state.
• You'll likely pay out-of-pocket. Many people mistakenly believe that Medicare and private health insurance pay for long-term care. In reality, Americans pay for most long-term care themselves until their savings become so depleted that they qualify for Medicaid. But Medicaid often means fewer choices, especially as states face budget crises. In most states, the majority of Medicaid funds for long-term care go toward institutional providers. Yet, AARP finds that most people prefer to receive care in their homes or through community programs.
• You may never need long-term care, but your loved one might. So the knowledge you gain planning for yourself can also make it easier for you to help the people in your life. According to a survey by the National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP, six out of 10 family caregivers are women. As a caregiver, you are more likely than a man to provide 40 or more hours of care a week.
• Caregiving affects your wallet and your job. According to AARP, more than 60 percent of family caregivers who are women say they've had to make career sacrifices to accommodate caregiving. This often means cutting back on work hours, passing up promotions, or leaving the workforce entirely.

Why Now?
You're part of a generation uniquely poised to redefine retirement, using your current earning power to save and invest wisely for the future. You still have time to build and expand support networks—on the job and through family, friends, community, and faith-based institutions—that can help you and those around you. Planning ahead increases your options and keeps you in charge of decisions that affect your life. It’s important for you to know the costs of long-term care options and how they might cover your choices through savings, investments, insurance, or other resources. The more your generation of women plans today, the more retirement, lifestyle, and financial choices you'll have later.


For more information about planning for long-term care, visit www.aarp.org/ltc. Decide to plan for long-term care, create a plan that works for you, and share it with your loved ones. Let AARP help you Decide. Create. Share.SM

Getting Started--What You Need to Know About Caring for Elder Parents

The Washington State Department on Aging and Disabilities Services provides helpful information on how to get started—when you feel it’s time to step in and help your elder parent.

Here is the link and excerpts from an overview on their website:

http://www.aasa.dshs.wa.gov/pubinfo/help/

Are You Caring for a Loved One?

This section will help you understand the basics of finding and getting services for an adult who needs help with care. This would include such things as meals, transportation, daily personal care, house and yard work.
There are also state programs that help pay for food, shelter, medical or general expenses, or offer reduced rate healthcare coverage. Learn more.

Finding care can seem complicated and even overwhelming when you first start looking. The key is to find knowledgeable people who can help you. The information included here can help you sort through what you need to know and do to find these people.

When first beginning to look for care for an adult, you will need to figure out:
• what additional care is needed now or soon;
• who to call to find out what help is available in your area;
• whether you can get the care needed at home or will need residential care; and
• how to pay for it.

Did You Know ?

It’s never too late to make simple lifestyle changes and stay independent longer. Learn more.

What Additional Care is Needed

The first step is to understand what care or additional support is needed. It is a good idea if everyone involved (the adult who needs more care/support and his/her loved ones) can sit down and talk about the current situation. Learn more about having this conversation.

It is also helpful to have an understanding of the types of care that is available. These are often referred to as services. Services can help with things the person is having difficulty with including:

• physical care (e.g. getting dressed, preparing meals, assistance with medications, help with personal hygiene, getting in or out of the bed, tub, toilet or the house);
• taking care of the house or apartment (e.g. light housekeeping, shopping, laundry);
• transportation (e.g. to doctor’s appointments, shopping);
• staying socially active and connected to others in the community.

See the Care Needs Checklists to help guide you through these possible care needs. Learn more about the types of services that help an adult remain at home.

A professional care manager (e.g. nurse or social worker) can also help evaluate the current situation. If you would like professional help, ask for some referrals when finding out what help is available in your area.

Do you know someone preparing to leave a hospital, nursing home, or other health care setting? The CDC has developed a Planning for Your Discharge (PDF) checklist of important things patients and caregivers should know in order to plan for a safe discharge from a health care setting.
How to use this information

Make a list of the care needs required now and soon. This list will help you communicate the kind of care, services or programs you are looking for. Though helpful, having this list is not a requirement to call for help.

Monday, December 7, 2009

Sent 90% of My Elder Care Book to My Editor

I am thrilled I completed and sent 90% of my elder care book to my editor!-just before leaving for my 2-week, 6-country Mediterranean Cruise.

I look forward to reviewing her comments when I return.

BTW, I am at JFK, awaiting my flight to Barcelona-now.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Ten Tell-tale Signs That Your Aging Parents Need Help

I noticed gradual changes in my (fiercely independent) parents’ decline each time I returned home to Chicago. Eventually, I realized I needed to pay closer attention to the not-so-obvious warning signs.

My parents had begun to sleep till 4PM, were eating leftovers older than me, and they were driving dangerously. I took steps to bring in help twice a week (4 hours at a time) and to have food sent to them. Once they needed full time help, the familiar home health caregiver remained on as part of the round-the-clock team.

How do YOU know your aging parents need help?

Here is a helpful list by By: Clare Absher RN, BSN

“Our nurses have compiled the following list... Do any sound familiar?”
• Not paying household bills on time or at all; Bills and important documents are not put away in appropriate places and left lying around
• Not recognizing need for, arranging, or scheduling necessary household repairs and maintenance; Lawn not mowed, trash disposed of, and mail retrieved with any regularity
• Driving safely becoming an issue such as increase in violations, accidents, easily becomes lost in familiar areas, and signs of deteriorating vision
• Not preparing meals, eating at regular times, or missing them completely; Poor selection of food is often on hand or old outdated food left in refrigerator
• Declining personal hygiene as indicated by unkempt hair, dirty or lengthy nails, poor oral hygiene, body or urine odor, unshaven, and wearing same clothes over and over
• Lack of interest in keeping up with housekeeping chores like laundry or cleaning or simply complains that it is too difficult or tiring to continue doing them
• Losing track of medications, missed doses, mistakes like overdosing or interactions resulting in health concerns if not hospitalizations
• Reluctance to leave the house, run usual shopping errands, visit friends and family, sleeping long periods, and uninterested in usual hobbies or activities
• Getting up and down stairs and in and out of home becoming difficult; Walking unsteady on level ground, complaining of dizziness, and falls are likely or have already occurred
• Not making sound decisions that are likely to cause self harm or danger to others such as leaving the stove turned on or cigarettes burning and not recognizing an emergency or knowing the appropriate response

Monday, November 30, 2009

Can I Get Paid to Care for a Family Member?

Here is a helpful piece by Clare Absher RN, BSN at HomeCareFiles.org

The short answer is "Maybe". Some states provide programs that pay family members to care for loved ones at home however they are usually somewhat limited. These programs vary widely from state to state and even within the same state. Although most states offer some type of respite or temporary relief for family caregivers, they often won't pay them on a regular basis to provide care leaving big gaps in caregiver services.

Most long-term care in the US is provided by informal and unpaid family caregivers. Family caregivers are undoubtedly the backbone of our long-term care system and vital to meeting the needs of our aging population. As a result of our country's dependence on families to care for loved ones at home, the federal government enacted the Family Caregiver Support Program (FCSP) in 2000.

All states now provide some type of support in varying degrees under FCSP which focuses efforts on family caregiving relief. State units on aging with assistance of local area agencies on aging oversee and administer family caregiving services. Many local programs offer families counseling and support groups, training, and respite care to give family caregivers a break. Click on your state contact links below to learn more about specific help offered in your area for family caregivers.

Information about additional family support programs may also be available through contacting your local social services, senior services, or county health departments. In some states, Medicaid (government health insurance for low-income Americans) will pay family caregivers to provide care to family members at home. However, note that Medicare (government health insurance for older Americans) will not pay for long-term or ongoing home care regardless of whether such services are provided through an agency or a family member. Take some time to research programs in your area that might be applicable to your situation including any reimbursement for family caregivers. To get started click on your state contact links below to learn more about specific help offered in your area for family caregivers.

Search for State Contacts for family caregiver support services offered by each state at HomeCareFiles.org.

You might also consider trying the Family Care Navigator offered by the Family Caregiver Alliance for additional information on this topic.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

We Dont All Get To Serve As Caregivers

My dearest friend was unable to serve as caregiver for her beloved Mom.

Her Mom was vibrant, energetic, serene, and full of plans for her future. At 75, just after returning from a birthday cruise with her husband, her body shut down and she fell brain dead. It was such an abrupt ending to a full and wonderful life.

She left a daughter who insists her Mom was her whole world! They were best friends, spoke every day, never quarreled, and visited every weekend.

My friend’s relationship with her Mom was cut short.

She was never given the opportunity to care for her declining Mom.

Fortunately, there was no unfinished business between them—no ill will, no regrets.

She was closer to her Mom than anyone I have ever seen.

I mourn for her loss.